I went to changi there today, where we went together, where I bluffed my mummy and said I was going for some musical (?) or something Haha. And I started guessing plane names by myself. My eyesight's deproved though. Still, it made me smile.



:)

Time to move on, you're no longer the person I knew.

Not going to run anymore, just one shot. Not going to run from one for another whom I no longer know. Not going to run, cause there's going to be a point where I stop running and stop being afraid of being left. Too many times I've run because of you, be it memories or because I still feel for you. The fear or the love, right now, I can't point out which it is. But it's gotta stop, now, it's gotta stop.

Not dependent anymore. Not on you. You've never been there.

Since when have you been someone to cry over results? Since when have you been on to be defeated? Enough crying now, it's okay if everything deproved, it's okay because this is not A's. Come on Charis, be brave, be braver than you've been, and press on, press on and don't give up.

I am sad, but I shouldn't let it overwhelm me. Pardon the self talk, I think I've been crying the whole day it should stop somewhere.

If I could, I'd tell you not to change.
I'd tell you that you were perfect the way you are and you don't need to change.
Most importantly, I don't want you to change.

But then I ask myself, what right do I have to even think those thoughts.
None. And I slowly let them go.

Today was quite a horrible day. First was crying like a retard who was unable to stop. Laughing and crying at the same time, couldn't breathe couldn't stop. Like a retard. Then I had to snap at you, I'm sorry, I shouldn't have. We were both just in a bad mood, I wish I didn't. And sigh.

My eyes still hurt omg! This is crazy. I shouldn't have cried. Why did I?

Sigh. Are we back to square one?