Rise and shine to a headache and a question.

Everything feels so surreal right now. Like every blow I go through, it's just something I go through. Not much heartache, not much pain, not much hurt anymore. I ask myself if it's healthy, I really figure, no. But whatever isn't it, there's no one I can really let in anymore, and I guess I only have myself to blame.

I wish I could tell myself that everything would and will be okay. I wish I could erase your memory from my mind. I wish I could forget and let go and just live with whoever you are right now. Love you for you, the present you. I do, but it's getting so hard. It's getting so hard because the person you once were and the person you are now seems miles apart, so different in so many ways. I wish I could bring you back, I wish I could help you see just how beautiful you were back then, and how you still are, but, different. I wish I could bring you back, but I know I can't anymore. I tried, I tried so hard. But maybe this is the time where I let go, and learn to accept that the person you were is gone now, and that you're the new you now and for all the days we're going to go through together. Maybe afterall, it's true like what you said, people grow up, people change. Maybe you have too. It's going to some time before I let go of who you were completely, but I will. And I'll start to love you for who you are, whoever you are, because I know loving someone, isn't about making him/her into who you want him/her to be. Because I promised you that I'll go through everything with you, rain or shine, walk with you through it all, I won't leave just because of these changes. I'm stronger than that, we're stronger than that. And because I love you, so very much, I'm not going to give up. I know I can do this, and I have to. Because you mean so very much to me.

But, I miss you listening. Most of all, I miss the feeling of being loved. Best friend, I miss you, so much. But from now on, I'm going to let you go.

Some memories can never be erased, and no matter how much you force someone to forget, it's futile. No one can ever forget memories, nothing can erase them. Not even if you want to. Even if you want to erase those memories, it may not be gone, just like how you want it to. Some things, are never that simple.

I'm still trying because I love you. I'm still trying because to me, you're the best friend one could ever have. I'm giving in, because I know you need me right now. I'm pushing it all away, because I want us to get better. You've seen me through so much, been with me through everything for so long, come on, let's not fall apart now. I love you babe, so much! We'll be strong okay. I'll pull you through.